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Joke of the Day
"Follow your instincts, into the path of a moving train."
Next Joke
"Did you hear about the tornado that swept through the cemetery? Hundreds dead."
"Men who claim to only watch the #SuperBowl for the ads are the same ones who say they only read Playboy for the articles."
"I just want to hug this out. With my hands around your neck type of hug. What I mean is, I want to strangle you."
"when a cop pulls me over i tell him i'm a nihilist and i don't believe in tickets or laws or authority. i do however now believe in tazers."
"What does a German say at a Dude Ranch? AUDI."
"Why did Paul Walker cross the road? To get to the other side."
"Why don't blind people like skydiving? It scares the crap out of the dog."
"*reaches for the stars* Stars: I have a boyfriend"
"What's the difference between a lawyer and a mosquito? One is a blood sucking parasite, and the other is an insect."