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Joke of the Day

"I don't know what base that was, but thank you TSA."

"Why are lesbians always low on cash? Because they're constantly eating out!"

"When a seeing eye dog poops, who cleans it up? This is the kind of stuff that makes my head hurt."

"Fact: People that choose a table over a booth have murdered at least one person."

"I got 99 problems and they're all friend requests from people I didn't like in high school."

"What happened when the orange slept with the dirty lemon? He got lemonaids."

"Did you hear Donald Sterling is having a child? Paula Dean is the mother."

"My grandfather had alzheimers..."

"Did you hear about the snail who used to be shipped around the world in wooden crates? He was ex-cargo."

"How Many Lightbulbs Does it Take to Change Captain Jean Luc Picard? 4 or 5."