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Joke of the Day
"Why is peter pan always flying? He neverlands. I like this joke because it never grows old."
Next Joke
"""And what do your parents do?"" BABY COW: Well, my mom is basically a vending machine and my dad is hamburgers"
"What do you call the horse that lives next door? Your NEIGHHHbor Credit: 6y/o nephew"
"Why couldn't they find the cheesemaker after the accident? He was trapped under da-Brie!"
"""Someone called me a butterface today! Is that bad?"" ""Well it's *half* a compliment."""
"Mountains aren't just funny...... .......the are hill areas!!"
"when i tell guys i want a baby i just assume they kno i don't mean a human one. i want a baby antelope, a baby hedgehog, a baby lizard"
"My neighbors have both a howling dog and a screaming baby out in their yard. I'd throw a rock or something but I'm afraid I'd hit the dog."
"Accidentally tweeted the typo ""iLettuce"" a few minutes ago and now Apple fans are lining up in front of my house."
"It's Earth Day... FUCK Uranus!"