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Joke of the Day

"On the bright side, every moment Bieber spends Tweeting is a moment he isn't spending recording or performing music."

"I was going to make a joke about amplifiers but I got too much negative feedback."

"Post your best one liner Mine: Excessive masterbation is often caused by hand-gina"

"I'm just a boy, standing in front of a girl, asking her to help me put a bunch of ducks in my car."

"I went to an orgy for squares and was confused by their one weird rule. Don't fuck around!"

"The waiter at the Mexican restaurant called me ""Amigo"". Am I in a gang now?"

"My left hand is dominant. Sometimes it spanks my right one."

"She said she needed her space and time.. Why didn't she ask for her velocity then?!"

"I hate when my iPod earbud cord gets hung on an object and it violently rips the earbud out and I get that murder-y feeling."

"Fidel Castro said he wouldn't die until America was destroyed. Well, looks like he died 17 days after."