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Joke of the Day
"Don't try to fix your computer the same day you quit drinking. You. Will. Relapse."
Next Joke
"You're exceeding the limits of my medication. Please go away."
"(Star Trek Related) What do Worf and Jadzia like to do to relax? Netflix and Trill!"
"""Honey, I'm pregnant"" ""Hello Pregnant"", he whispers, tears of joy in his eyes. ""I'm Dad"""
"We will require you to do something somewhat onerous and time-comsuming and then introduce impediments to completing it. - my employer"
"What's better than winning a silver medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded"
"When I was growing up plastic surgery was a bit of a taboo subject... These days if you mention Botox no one raises an eyebrow."
"What do you call a hot girl in Germany ? Tourist"
"I had to do my nightly chores twice today Thanks daylight savings!"
"How many millennials does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it's already lit fam."