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Joke of the Day

"On the news: there's a shortage of maternity-ward staff. You could say it's a bit of a...*looks away* *mumbles* MIDWIFE crisis! (...sorry.)"

"I was talking to the anorexic cannibal.. I told him self-indulgence isn't the answer and he needs to face his problems. He threw up his arms and walked away."

"Another Old Blonde Joke A brunette yells to a blonde across a river, ""Hey! How do I get to the other side of the river?"" The blonde yells back ""You are on the other side!"""

"I just don't get bukkake It goes straight over my head."

"i'm happy when life hands me lemons. can't do shots of tequila with artichokes."

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Teenage Mutant Ninja Barbie ...one of the Turtles with Barbie head"

"Trump & Hillary are on a boat. The boat sinks, who survives? The United States."

"My wife dressed up as a police woman last night and giggled, ""You're being charged with being good in bed..."" After two minutes she said she was dropping the charge due to lack of evidence."

"An Irishman... An Irishman walks out of a bar."

"What do you call a bear in the rain? Drizzly bear."