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Joke of the Day
"What does a French carpenter say when he runs out of nails? I haven't a clous."
Next Joke
"I don't think any other job sees as many erections as mine... I work with planning permission at the council. P.S. I made this one, kinda funny I suppose"
"My girlfriend asked me how much we would spend at our wedding. Me: I don't want to spend very much. Her: I want it to be a ten thousand dollar wedding. Me: Okay, so you, can do that then."
"Don't stand in the rain if you're stuck in a shit storm"
"There are three things I hate... * reposts * bullet lists * irony"
"A robber broke into a perfume store... He raided the register and stole everything in the store, he took every last scent."
"My Dad's last words I'll never forget the last words my dad said on 9/11 ""Allahu Akbar"""
"If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put u and i closer together... Because *you* are an *idiot*."
"Why should Donald Trump be grateful to Mexicans? The power of belief in chupacabras is all that keeps his hair in this world."
"Why don't hipsters like rivers? Too mainstream"