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Joke of the Day

"Pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in his pants. Bartender says ""Hey Mr. Pirate, ya know you have a steering wheel in your pants?"" Pirate says ""Yarrrrr, it's driving me nuts."""

"Why can't the penis and testicles ever be together? Because there's a vas deferens between them."

"My toddler puts his pants on just like everyone else. One arm at a time."

"Q: Why are all black people fast? A: Because the slow ones are in jail."

"Damn it's so cold out i saw woman in two pairs of pajamas at walmart"

"A man is caught staring so hard at his marriage certificate by his wife... She asks him what he's looking for. He replies, ""oh just the expiration date!"""

"This one's a classic from my childhood: Say the letter ""X"" ten times fast. \\_()_/ "

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To get some chicks. (nephew made this joke, he's 5 years old :o)"

"A man using apple maps walks into a bar.. ..or maybe it was a church or a grocery store or something"

"I hate it when my sock puppets fight. I don't have a free hand to break them up."