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Joke of the Day

"I support Greenpeace because I care about environmental activism, just not enough to do any of the real work myself."

"Jokes about menstrual cycles are not funny. Period."

"One time I threw my cat at a spider so I could escape, but sure I'd love to hold your baby"

"I just came up with the BEST joke for Trump Trump is like gold. Incredibly dense, but somehow worth something."

"How to break into comedy Crack a joke"

"What do you call an arrogant patronizing thief coming down the stairs? A condescending con descending."

"Did you say that you fell over fifty feet but didn't hurt yourself? Yes - I was trying to get to the back of the bus."

"A blind man walks into a bar ""Ow!"" he exclaims. The bartender responds by saying that he doesn't know that drink."

"Knock Knock **Who's there?** You **You who?** Yoo hoo big summer blowout!"

"Valentines Day Drinks: $80. Dinner: $75. The room: $250. The look on his face when she says ""I'm on my period"": Priceless."