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Joke of the Day
"What's worse than a pedophile? A fucking pedophile."
Next Joke
"My dog left me christmas present under the tree I had to clean it up"
"Did you hear about the guy who was convicted for committing lewd acts on fruit at a grocery store? (Mildly NSFW) He got off on a peel."
"How can you tell an auto mechanic just had sex? One of his fingers is clean"
"All of the construction that was slowing down traffic during the summer is over now. I don't know why they can't repair those cones indoors."
"What's the husband's equivalent of a wife counting the days since her last period? A husband counting the days since he last had sex."
"If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands. There's nothing more endearing than happy people applauding themselves."
"Everyone suffering from diseases and natural disasters: hang in there, we're liking Facebook posts as fast as we can"
"If your drug dealer answers your call on the first ring .... he's a cop."
"if you write something and include a ""tl;dr"" version that just means you're shitty at keeping peoples attention with your awful writing"