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Joke of the Day

"What do you say to someone who studied media at university? Can I have fries with that please?"

"I'm glad you all tweeted mean stuff at me because I've changed my mind. On everything! Congrats! You did it!"

"(Original) Why should you keep a broken clock? It's just nice having an extra set of hands around."

"If you take a dump on a leaf You will have a shitty thyme"

"Is it possible for God to be a Cheeto Puffed? Because these taste pretty fucking great. EDIT: I'm getting downvoted but figure this is the reddit algorithm! cheeky cunts"

"A cashier asks a feminist, "" Cash or credit?"" She replies: "" Did you just assume my tender?"""

"The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that Subway is healthy."

"Women, should start bragging about their size like men do. For example, I happen to be hung like a Tic-Tac."

"Having trouble focusing because I watched a man use a key as a Q-tip on the subway today."

"I heard on the news Stoners took over a town This was a high coup"