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Joke of the Day

"I've invented a new word. Plagerism http://reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/2oy5fe/i_made_up_a_new_word/"

"Sure fire way to really annoy a woman tell her she is being too dramatic and overreacting."

"Mom stop you are not funny Son: Mom stop you are not funny, you never make jokes. Mom: I made you."

"I saw a man at the beach yelling ""Help, shark! Help!"" I just laughed, I knew that shark wasn't going to help him."

"When I was molested at age 7 it was horrible. It must have been his first time or something."

"The problem with having a large imagination is that you can imagine your friends naked. Now you're doing it too."

"My wife has just left me, taking my satellite dish and Bob Marley collection. No woman, no Sky."

"A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. When the neutron gets his drink, he asks, ""Bartender, how much do I owe you?"" The bartender replies, ""For you, neutron, no charge."""

"Fun Game: 1. Glue dark sunglasses to all pigeons in a park. 2. Poke stranger on the shoulder. 3. Whisper, ""I think we're being watched..."""

"Do you like warts? No. Don't worry. They'll grow on you."