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Joke of the Day
"""Watch me smell my wine."" - white people"
Next Joke
"Accidentally played dad instead of dead when I encountered a bear and now it can ride a bike without training wheels. #circuseverydamnday"
"I'm drinking coffee because people think you've got a problem if you drink vodka in the morning!"
"Why did the alcoholic chop off the little boy's legs? He wanted his *Kidneys*."
"When in trouble I think What Would Justin Bieber Do? scream like a little girl, grab nonexistent testicles & run away awkwardly."
"Your mama so stupid that..... Your mama so stupid that she threw a rock at the ground and missed"
"Your heart! *bursts out laughing* It's an inside joke."
"What do you call the president when he is rolling down a snowy hill? An Obama-nable snowman"
"...how is life in North Korea? I can't complain."
"My husband told me he'd like to be woken up by a blowjob... ...so I put my dick in his mouth to wake him up."