74148

Joke of the Day

"I got nothing better to do, dude in a Prius, I will absolutely follow you all the way home just to let you know you're a terrible driver"

"A man is going through customs entering Australia The man behind the desk asks him ""do you have a criminal record?"" The man replies ""No, I didn't know that was still a requirement"""

"Screaming out ""BOOM PREGNANT!"" during sex is never as funny as you think it will be."

"What's green and comes out of your nose at 160mph? A lambo-greenie!"

"ME: please show me the posts in the order that they were made COMPUTER: thats too hard. heres some tweets i think are good. Do you like this"

"""It was Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve!"" Whatever. The point is, it was two people with contemporary American names."

"What's one good thing about Switzerland? Well I guess the flag's a big plus"

"Shout out to authentic Indian restaurants that encourage eating using only the hands. They don't give a fork."

"I escaped Iraq. Wanna know how? Iran."

"A joke my grandfather told me about insecurity Never mind, it's stupid"