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Joke of the Day

"Age 15: kids are stupid Age 25: kids are stupid Age 35: I love my kids but kids are stupid"

"I'm not laughing AT you, I'm laughing WITH other people at you."

"I've just started a band called 999 Megabytes. We haven't done a gig yet."

"[puts puppy in microwave] [googles instructions for making hotdogs] [quickly releases puppy from microwave]"

"Why did so many jews die at Auschwitz? Because the exit doors were coin operated."

"Why are lilypads round? So that it's easier for the hippos to jump on them."

"A Christmas joke A boy was given a soccer ball for Christmas. But he cried tears of agony and pain. Why? He had no legs"

"Why did Hillary go to the gynecologist? She was feelin' the Bern!"

"How much of northern Canada is livable? *Nunavut*"

"I watched a documentary on marijuana It was very enjoyable. I think all documentaries should be watched this way."