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Joke of the Day

"I don't see why racists are upset with Harriet Tubman being on the $20 bill... They can finally legally own a black person again."

"2 Fish were in a tank... One fish says to the other, ""Hey who's driving this thing?"""

"*gives joke answer to daughter's 75th consecutive question* [20 years later, she's in an office] ""Everyone knows the moon was built in 1973"""

"What do you get if you drop a piano down a mine shaft? A miner."

"How do you recycle a condom? Turn it inside out and shake the fuck out of it."

"I don't want to hear about any moonlit romantic walks on the beach...unless there's a clown with a wooden club chasing you."

"Why did the hipster burn his tongue? He drank his tea before it was cool."

"All girls love surprises. I didn't know putting a snake in her handbag was wrong. We can't understand women."

"What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's cheese."

"What's the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus? It only takes one nail to hang the picture. -.-"