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Joke of the Day

"This is very serious ... please read and be aware: IF YOU GET AN E-MAIL TITLED, ""NUDE PHOTO OF HILLARY CLINTON,"" DON'T OPEN IT.... IT CONTAINS A NUDE PHOTO OF HILLARY CLINTON !!"

"I don't have a high opinion about myself when I play PC games... It's my low self on Steam."

"A joke Chris Rock should have used at the Oscars The Oscars.... where the carpets are red and the candidates are white."

"Thank you everyone! As the newest mod of /r/news, I would like to say [removed]"

"It's no wonder we've never met an alien, i'd have a hard time developing a space program if no one believed in me, too."

"Did you hear about the newly announced cure for Parkinson's Disease? It's in a bottle with instructions to ""shake well"""

"Counselor: Wash your face. I can see what you had for breakfast. Henry: If you're so smart what did I have? Counselor: Eggs. Henry: Wrong. I had eggs yesterday!"

"How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None. They'll just beat the room for being black"

"The cannibal was late to dinner He was given the cold shoulder"

"""Gary give me the gun"" ""I thought you had it"" ""I TOLD you to bring it"" ""I didn't"" ""who brought the getaway car?"" -Disorganized crime"