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Joke of the Day

"My favorite knock knock joke when I'm feeling like an asshole. Knock Knock. Who's there? To. To who? Actually it's 'to whom'."

"Football is like Sex your mom sucks at both"

"Why did the cannibal get banned from the hospital? He kept trying the doctors patients(patience)"

"As a doctor, I've never made a joke about an unvaccinated baby before but let me give it a shot."

"Glad I'm not a general, because auto-correct just changed ""lunch order"" to ""launch order."""

"What do you find in a church's bathroom? Holy shit."

"Supermarket Workers So this woman comes to the meat section of a supermarket and asks the butcher if he has any brain, and he responds with: ""Miss, if I had a brain I wouldn't be working here"""

"I went to a shitty store today They only sold stools"

"We would tease Jacob because he had glasses. Once we pulled them of him, but then he began to tease us because we had glasses."

"It's like my Mom used to say, always keep a positive pregnancy test around in case you need to ruin a man's life."