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Joke of the Day

"There was once this starving homeless man near Pyongyang... This joke has been removed. Food and shelter is plentiful in North Korea. To desire more is greed."

"My wife had the best Mother's Day I didn't ask her for sex, not even once."

"I always hated weddings... I always hated weddings because the elderly would come over and poke me saying ""You're next."". They stopped doing it when I started doing it to them at funerals."

"M.C. Escher goes into an ou so s W."

"What happened to the egg and his girlfriend? They broke up."

"I can't wait for my girlfriend to get up and swap tampons. Let's see what she thinks of the party popper I've put inside her."

"One time my husband asked me to dance for him and I performed the entire Lion King musical to the best of my ability."

"I only have room in my brain to care about three people and six types of cheese at any time."

"I don't know what is more nerve wrecking... this first kiss or the first fart."

"How do I know you're not a cop? ""If I was a cop, how would I have this?"" *shows police badge that just says 'Not a Cop' on it* Oh, okay good"