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Joke of the Day

"whats the difference between Court and Supreme Court? Supreme Court comes with sour cream and guac."

"If a man opens the car door for his wife... it's either a new car or a new wife."

"There was a mass sodomy at the McDonald farm. Everyone found out because the pig squealed."

"What happened to Frankenstein's monster on the road? He was stopped for speeding fined $50 and dismantled for six months."

"Let's talk about sausage.... Isn't it the wurst?"

"Why does the internet always mourn the death of politicians? Because they are always lion about everything."

"I just fake-went-to-the-bathroom to avoid someone. He followed me in. I don't think the pee noises I'm making with my mouth are working."

"How do we know Jesus turned water into wine at parties? Because if he turned the **wine** into **water** someone would have kicked the shit out of him."

"I accidentally went grocery shopping on an empty stomach and now I'm the proud owner of aisle 4."

"Why do suicide bombers have 72 virgins? one for each chunk."