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Joke of the Day

"Nah mate, when the Americans talk about football they mean that silly game where the fat men dress up as Transformers"

"The best jokes are the ones that have to be explained. Get it? Because that's the opposite of the truth, I was using sarcasm."

"After sex, a lot of people like to smoke a cigarette. As a gay man, me and my boyfriend smoke weed after sex. After all, in the bible it says ""if a man lies with another man, he should be stoned."""

"James Bond. Great spy? Or guy who gets captured every mission."

"So in the old days Jesus told me that he needs an ark, I reply : ""I noah guy"""

"I went to the doctors with hearing problems He said ""Can you describe the symptoms?"" I said ""Homers a fat bloke and Marge has blue hair"""

"Stupidity: Running over a string 10 times with the vacuum cleaner, picking it up, looking at it, then putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance."

"What is another word for a rap battle? Black-on-black rhyme"

"Do you know the official psychiatric term for when a woman keeps getting more and more cats? It's called an Add-A-Puss Complex."

"What kind of monster is safe to put in the washing machine?- A wash and wear wolf"