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Joke of the Day
"Why is a schoolhouse red? You would be too if you had 7 periods a day."
Next Joke
"Wife just got me a new tv for Christmas! Looks like my New Years resolution is 1080."
"Muffins. So there are two muffins in an oven. One says to the other, ""Is it getting hot in here, or is it just me?"" And the second one says, ""Holy shit, a talking muffin!"""
"What do you call a used rubber in a church parking lot? Family practice"
"Cop: ""Sir, what's in the bottle next to you? Me: ""It's water"" Cop: ""Sir, this is wine"" Me: ""What? Jesus! He did it again!"""
"A new study shows that un-vaccinated children are less likely to be autistic because they are more likely to be dead."
"I heard that processed meats are just as bad for you as cigarettes so I'm walking around smoking a hot dog looking cool as hell."
"Why do gorillas have such big nostrils? Because they have big fingers! Not mine. Told to me by my late grandfather, funniest pastor ever. :)"
"Someone just suggested that I use Mapquest. I suggested that he use a rotary phone."
"Why did the angry Jedi cross the road? To get to the dark side."