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Joke of the Day
"I just drop my keyboard on the floor by accident... I lost control."
Next Joke
"Quack Quack Who's there? A duck."
"I'm sitting outside drinking myself into a stupor. I may feel like shit tomorrow but by God, so will the mosquitoes."
"My phone just fell down a flight of stairs, but it's ok, it was in my pocket."
"MUGGER: give me ur wallet ME: stand back i have mace MUGGER: [sniffing] is this cookies-scented febreze"
"There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is five feet ten inches tall, and he wears size 13 sneakers. What does he weigh? meat"
"Give a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a night. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life. Credit: Philip J. Fry"
"*Astronaut takes a photo of Earth from space* Earth: ""Delete it."""
"Well, son, when a man loves a woman very much he expresses that love by slowly transforming into a human sloth."
"I wrote a song about a tortilla... Well, actually, it's more of a wrap."