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Joke of the Day

"My uncle died after falling out of a helicopter.. ..so at his funeral we got him a wreath in the shape of a parachute. Well, it's what he would have wanted."

Next Joke
 
"What's the difference between your work and your wife ? In 5 years, your work will still suck"
"In Russia, Vladimir Putin has said that the killers of Nemtsov ""will be ruthlessly hunted down."" He added, ""It's cheaper than paying them"""
"A prostitute said she would do anything for $10... Guess who just got their car washed!"
"How does the moon cut his hair? 'Eclipse it."
"One direction splitting up? My daughter just announced to me she is in d-Niall :-)"
"You are what you eat. *eats Ryan Gosling* *crosses fingers*"
"A Mormon walks into a bar."
"What do you call a nun who just passed her bar exam? A sister-in-law"
"Damn you bladder stop releasing my precious beer."