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Joke of the Day

"Fun Fact: If you lie down in an aisle at Walmart for a couple hours, they will tag you and put you in a clearance bin."

Next Joke
 
"my disrespectful teen son somehow got hold of a gluten product and now he wants to become a cat girl"
"My mom just texted me to say that her dog killed 2 groundhogs in her backyard this morning so I think she may be doing Groundhog Day wrong."
"I bought the world's worst thesaurus yesterday. Not only is it terrible, it's terrible."
"What does a martial artist get at starbucks Chai Tea"
"Ladies: A good man can make you feel sexy, strong and able to take on the world...oh sorry thats wine...wine does that."
"[Marriage Counseling] Wife: He's always messing up even the simplest phrases. Me: I THOUGHT we were gonna keep that on the download..."
"Shortest joke I know. Dwarf shortage."
"Everybody was Feng Shui fighting, those cats improved my ambient lighting."
"Me: u can walk around without shoes Teacher: right Me: but after a while it hurts your feet Teacher: ok Me: so time wounds all the heels"