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Joke of the Day

"A couple drops of super glue on your fingers and you wont pay attention to any other thing on the planet for three hours."

"What do you call a gay chickpea? A hummussexual."

"At least I have all day sober to Sunday up....."

"Who's the coolest guy in the hospital? The ultra-sound guy. [read next comment]"

"Two guys walk into a bar... ""Ouch!"""

"If Clinton wins the election... There'll be another Bush in the White House"

"Dogs. Because when everyone looks at you like you're crazy, they look at you like you're amazing."

"How many South Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A Brazillian."

"Active voice: I loved your book Passive voice: Your book was loved Passive-aggressive voice: I love how you felt the need to write a book"

"2 atoms of helium acting funny ~ HeHe"