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Joke of the Day

"How do you plug a plow into a car stereo? Through the ox input."

"The most difficult part about taking a personality test is deciding which personality should take it."

"You can't keep two ducks alone together It's a paradox."

"What do you call the hair of a centaur? Humane."

"I run a suicide hotline. A guy called me once, told me I had 60 seconds to convince him not to jump off his balcony on the 41st floor. He must've confused me with the *anti*-suicide hotline."

"Broke a mirror today Seven years bad luck, my lawyer says he will get it down to five"

"My friend said he was going to become a mime I haven't heard from him in a while"

"Why is Santa always so jolly? He knows where all the naughty girls are."

"Did You Know Willie Nelson Just Died? He was playing On The Road Again."

"You can learn a lot about your kids by helping them with their homework for example, mine are idiots."