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Joke of the Day

"Momma bird: welcome to the world! Baby bird: thx! M: for the next few months instead of food, I'ma just throw up in your mouth. B: wait what"

Next Joke
 
"""VROOM VROOM! VROOM VROOM VROOM! SCREECH!"" - Entire script for Fast and the Furious 6"
"I went to visit my Grandpa... My Grandpa said, ""Your generation relies too much on technology!"" I replied, ""No, your generation relies too much on technology!"" Then I unplugged his life support."
"Pro tip for picking up girls keep your back straight and lift with your knees."
"I feel like a lot of single women have been naming their cats Adele this year."
"What did the officials say whenever systematic punishment was banned? There's no punchline."
"You wanna hot body? You wanna Bugatti? You wanna Maseratti? Then this is an intervention you NEED to stop listening to Britney Spears."
"How do redneck Na'vi get their skin tone? Blue Genes... I'll be here all week"
"What's a Dungeons and Dragons player's favorite rap group? D12"
"She asked for my name, if I'm alone, had me remove belt/shoes & take out what I have in my pants. Interactions w/TSA agents are underrated."