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Joke of the Day
"i told my cat i was gonna teach him to speak English ... he looked at me & said ""Me? how?"""
Next Joke
"What do you call a fish with no eyes? ....a fssshhh..."
"Ke$ha is what all drunk white girls look like to drunk black dudes."
"What did the geologist say at the Chinese restaurant? May I have Eurasian plate?"
"I like to write all my death threat letters in Comic Sans. I find it lightens the mood."
"""Still upset about earlier?"" Yeah ""So you knocked over a few spaghetti boxes at the store. No big deal"" I WAS A WORLD JENGA CHAMPION, SALLY"
"*surgeon opens cooler during transplant* *cooler is full of Gatorade* ""Wait but this means..."" *cut to surgeon's kids dumping kidney on coach*"
"1. Cover elevator floor with glue. 2. Put ring on floor. 3. Wait for someone to kneel and get stuck. 4. ""Yes, yes, a thousand times yes!"""
"a serial killer that targets anyone who pronounces the ""S"" in Illinois"
"What do goats do on election day? Voat. co"