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Joke of the Day

"What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass.....nyahahahaha (10 points for who knows the source of this classic joke)"

"Cows What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef What do you call a cow with three legs? Lean Beef What do you call a cow with two legs? Your mom."

"This hating of people that breastfeed in public should really stop... I can raise my cat any way I want to."

"Who called them fake potatoes and not imitaters."

"*dancing with the stars* *all of a sudden there's a fault in our stars* me(to stars): what the hell guys? we practiced this! *star wars*"

"Why do bees hum? Because they don't know the words!"

"""Grandpa, why did everyone make a big deal out of selfies when they're just pictures, oh and thanks a lot for doing nothing about climate."""

"How do you know that Abraham Lincoln was Jewish? He was shot in the temple."

"Gin & Tonic: 91 calories. Banana: 105 calories. Choosing the healthy option: Priceless."

"Inspirational Tweet: Found the sock gone missing 7 weeks ago in today's clean laundry. Sometimes they come back, people. Keep the faith."