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Joke of the Day

"I'm now on year 3 of the '7 day ab challenge'"

"You like parachuting? That's messed up... you like the Paris Shooting!?"

"Did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and leg? He's all right."

"What did the saxophone teacher say to his student? You have learned well young brasshopper."

"A man walked into a bar... don't worry...he was fine he just had a minor bump on his head."

"I'm eating a vegan lunch today. Sure, it's six sleeves of Smarties and a Diet Coke, but I'm still better than you."

"What's the name of the Pokemon that causes birth defects? Zikachu"

"Wife ran into my ex girlfriend today. I asked if she still looked good? Always wondered what the worst thing I could say was. That was it."

"I went to a fortune teller and he told me a lot of money was coming my way. I walked out really excited, then I got hit by a Securicor van."

"Did you know the internet was created by egyptians They have a long history of worshiping cats and writing on walls. Inspired by a post on showerthoughts"