6866

Joke of the Day

"They say choose a major you love and you'll never work a day in your life... because that field probably isn't hiring."

"When I pay for my groceries and the cashier hands me the receipt I like to smile and say ""this will all be poop soon""."

"I went on a date with a girl who was born without feet. I forgot my wallet and asked if she could foot the bill. There was no second date."

"Did you hear about the crack addict that got trapped in a pyramid? He had to sarcophagi for the drug money"

"Most people don't realize the Hunchback of Notre Dame's back problems were a result of his grueling database entry job."

"Sean Connery and fat girl with a lisp meet in a bar"

"Original Yo Momma? (I think, please verify) Yo mommas so fat, shes being traded on the oil futures market!"

"I'm not racist but.. I saw a black guy running down the street with a TV and I thought ""that's mine"" Then I realized mine is at home, polishing my shoes"

"What do you call a female peacock? A peacunt."

"If I burn my mouth on ONE MORE FUCKING PIZZA I will probably continue to buy and eat pizza for the rest of my life."