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Joke of the Day

"What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar? OH SNaP!"

"How can you tell soap operas are fictional? In real life, men aren't affectionate out of bed. "

"How disturbingly inappropriate would it be if ""Thomas the Tank Engine"" was set in early-1940s Germany? #ThomasDieKleineLokomotive"

"My dad was going out. He told me to watch the fire I said ""no thanks, I've seen it before"""

"What do you call a mexican who lost his car. Carlos"

"As I approach 50, my wife suggested I get myself one of those high performance penis enlargers... So I have. She's 25 and her name is Candy."

"Why did it take so long for Americans to beat Germany in WW2? They weren't Russian."

"A sarcastic thumbs-up is a good substitute for the middle finger."

"So about that guy with the premature ejaculation problem.... ...i heard he comes out of nowhere"

"Women are like tornadoes... They moan like hell when they come, and take the house when they leave."