68403

Joke of the Day

"Ye olde insult battle Insult the person above you in ye olde english. Try to quote shakespeare if you have any quotes in your head. I'll start. Thou dissembler, thou! I fear thee not."

"What do you say when you're comforting a grammar Nazi? There, their, they're."

"Why wasn't the plastic surgeon worried about running out of breast implants anytime soon? He had a large drawer of chests right there in his office."

"What is Bill Cosby's arch-nemesis? Smelling salts."

"I was at the ATM when an old lady came up to me and asked to check her balance... So I pushed her over."

"Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than everyone else looks?"

"If you have 3 tweets in a row that say what you're cooking, what song you're listening to, and what your mood is... just go back to Facebook."

"What do the 12th of July and the end of an essay have in common? They're both summary!"

"Did you hear that Henry Ford wrote a book? The driving point is that it's auto-biographical."

"Please don't make fun of the Holocaust My grandfather died by falling off the guard tower Edit: Spelling"