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Joke of the Day

"I use head&shoulders Me: I use head&shoulders frequently Friend: But you dont have dandroof? Me: Exactly!"

"Did you hear about the recently unemployed electrician? Apparently he's now ohm-less."

"Shazam but for telling you the name of someone who's only just been introduced to you 5 minutes ago but you weren't listening."

"While fixing my neighbors car I asked her for a screwdriver... She asked if I had orange juice. We've been dating since."

"My city was so poor growing up that Planned Parenthood was just a bicycle without a seat."

"Discovered that my wife can talk to me THROUGH THE SPEAKERS OF MY NEW CAR so I'm returning it."

"Boy, do I love soccer It's the only sport where the fans are tougher then the players."

"High school prepares you for real life! For example, show choir taught me how to put on eyeliner and lip liner in a car on the freeway"

"The Browns asked if they could put a pokestop inside the stadium... in hopes that people would attend their games."

"Trump is a great guy. He's giving two million illegal immigrants free trips to Mexico."