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Joke of the Day

"#I #love #how #you #hashtag #a #million #words #on #all #your #instagram #pics. #i #hope #you #get #your #period #in #a #sharktank."

"if theres 'national public radio'? (npr) is there also 'private public schools'?"

"How do you make a blind man mad? Awwwwwww. Look at them pretty flowers."

"A dyslexic guy walked into a bra."

"Dear Mom and Dad, if you can read this tweet, Congratulations!!! it's time for lesson number 10."

"It's ironic how the Segway-driving chinese cameraman plowed into the fastest man alive... ...because he ran into a bolt."

"Why are chemists such whores? They keep talking about their nitrates"

"Captain Ahab's crew were highly efficient sailors In fact, they were running like a whale oiled machine."

"I went to the club last night... They played The Twist, so I did the twist. They played Jump, so I jumped. They played Come On Eilien... and I got kicked out."

"I too was once a male trapped in a female body... But then my mother gave birth."