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Joke of the Day

"Why are 1980 pennies worth more than 1979 pennies? (Dads joke) The same reason 10 pennies is worth more than 9."

"There was an old woman walking her dog A man came up to her and said that's an ugly pig. The woman replied ""Sir, that's not a pig."" The man said ""I was talking to the dog!"""

"I finally found a girl who is like my mother in every way! I brought her home and wouldn't you know it... my dad doesn't like her"

"nurse: ""if youre going to give grapes to a baby make sure you cut them in half"" me: [visibly confused] wife: ""the grapes keith not the baby"""

"tifu by getting inside someone else's underwater vessel Whoops, wrong sub"

"A good way to break up with a girl gently is to curtsy when youre meeting her father instead of shaking his hand."

"What do all North Korean's say when you ask them how their day was? ""can't complain"""

"Wanna hear a corny joke? Ethanol"

"Why is Santa's sack so full? Because he only comes once a year."

"A sandwich walks into a bar. A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says: ""Sorry, we don't serve food in here."""