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Joke of the Day

"I like my steak like I like my women. White and domineering."

"Yo mama so poor... ...she can't even pay attention!"

"I like my women like my coffee... In a burlap sack, on the back of a donkey."

"Why should you always refuse to lend an Ape money? It's dangerous to let him put the bite on you!"

"did you see Iran play in the world cup? I heard they played like Shiate'"

"Cute skinny girls wearing weird mismatched clothes: hot quirky hipsters Me wearing weird mismatched clothes: homeless lady from the 80s"

"How does Jaden Smith keep getting roles in big movies? Where there's a Will, there's a way."

"You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to."

"Why do mermaids wear seashells? Because D-shells are too big and B- shells are too small. *A random elderly woman just stopped in the street in front off where I was sitting and told me this. Awesome*"

"Boy to Friend: I'm sorry I won't be able to go out after school. I promised Dad that I would stay in and help him with my homework."