66339

Joke of the Day

"My boss: Are you on Twitter? Me: I've never heard of it. Is it a drug? Why would you ask? Am I acting funny? Maybe you're acting funny."

"I thought I found my soul mate for a minute there, but he was just a pervert on the internet. *runs after him"

"A Pagan sees a particularly shocking event ... ""Deer *god*!"""

"What happens to a plate made out of cookies when you drop it? It chips."

"Sooner or later Rockstar is going to make a GTA that features every possible human action you can do and then the world will implode."

"One nation, under Trump, divisible... Trade liberty and justice for Wall."

"I can't Colbert it, they were the Stewartship of my news and entertainment."

"Some Muslim extremists just rammed a boat into the Thames Barrier. Experts believe it's the start of Ramadam."

"Today's my cake day! And I'm going to eat it too!"

"A farmer invested $10 million of his own money for a research on 'effects of Marijuana on cattle'. The steaks were high."