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Joke of the Day

"A three year old boy in his bath examined his testicles and asked ""Mommy, are these my brains?"" Mom said, ""Not yet, honey."""

"If I could have dinner with anyone, alive or dead, no question, I would want to be alive."

"Why did Holden Caulfield hate his job at Sprint? He was surrounded by phone-ys!"

"Did you hear about the depressed horse? He told a tale of whoa!"

"Welcome to Passive Aggressive Club. We all got here early, but you just take your time."

"A pirate walks into a bar with a ships wheel down the front of his pants. The bartender says, ""Hey mate, what's with the wheel?"" The pirate responds, ""Arg, it's driving me nuts!"""

"Scared the mailman today by going to the door completely naked. Not sure what scared him more, my naked body or that I knew where he lived."

"My New Girlfriend Facebook asks what I'm thinking. Twitter asks what I'm doing. Google asks where I am. The internet has turned into my girlfriend."

"Why is the blood of christ wine? Because he drank religiously"

"interviewer: any interests outside of work me: war and space documentaries mom: he means star wars me: mom stay in the car mom: nerd"