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Joke of the Day

"What's a redneck's favorite dating website? Ancestry.com"

"'I Love You' is a mathematical function where, 'I Love' - is constant and ; 'You' - is a variable.."

"Did you know that gullible is the only English word that is not in the dictionary? I'm serious, it isn't. Go look it up and see for yourself."

"[trying to make small talk with the lady cutting my hair] so what do you do for a living"

"Why are Ice Cream Truck music so loud ? NSFW To muffle the sound of the captive kids that are held captive"

"How does the pope refer to his secret superhero identity? It's his altar ego."

"I think my girlfriend has had 61 lovers before me... Because she calls me her sixty second lover"

"Why are women like magazines? They have a lot of issues"

"What time is it? http://youtu.be/mHyRCeKxhss This is an animated joke. I hope a video submission flies here."

"Instructions in the Men's Room for hand washing. Because non-hand washers can't be bothered unless there's an opportunity to learn stuff."