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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a Phillipino contortions? A manilla folder"

"Specimen: An Italian astronaut"

"I like my bread the way I like my women... French and covered in butter."

"Every morning, I jog around my block 15 times. Then I pick the block up and put it back with the rest of it's little Lego friends."

"My wife gave me the silent treatment for a week... It ended when I told her ""We've been getting along really well lately""."

"Eating a meal on an airplane makes me feel like a Tyrannosaurus rex who has to operate on a baby."

"Stupid seal at the zoo would not sing ""kiss by a rose."" REFUND!"

"I pitched my movie idea to a producer . It was about a kid who found out his transgender uncle was a superhero. I called it Auntman, the producer didn't get the idea, because he was black..."

"What do you get when you cut yourself while having sex with a member of Queen? Band Aids"

"What is the difference between a paycheck and a cock? You don't have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck!"