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Joke of the Day

"[running from a knife wielding murderer] oh hell yeah, my Fitbit steps are gonna be OFF THE SCALE today"

"What is the hardest part of twerking? Being black"

"What does an IT guys use for birth control? His personality."

"My girlfriend and I were having sex so loud we woke up the whole house. My wife was furious."

"I was so close to a threesome last night Only fell 2 people short"

"Whenever someone says smart phones are turning people into zombies, look up from your phone just long enough to bite them."

"What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot"

"My boyfriend recently called me his woman And now we're living in the jungle, wearing deer skin and hunting for food"

"There are two kinds of woman who never complain. GIFs and JPGs"

"I still believe in love. But I also believe in sasquatch, nessy, and that I could win the lottery. So there's that...."