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Joke of the Day

"Q: What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree? A: Hold on to your nuts, this is no ordinary blow job!"

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"Life isn't about winning and losing. It's about wishing you would have won and wondering why you lost."
"I've lost all the aces from this deck of cards. I just can't deal with this."
"reckon the clouds look down and say, ''look! that one is shaped like an idiot?''"
"How many TSA agents does it take to change a lightbulb? None. TSA agents only know how to remove clothes; putting them on is different matter completely."
"How do you know your wife's dead? The sex is the same but the dishes pile up."
"There are two kinds of people in the world 1. Those that like black licorice. 2. Normal people."
"Impress an Asian chick by treating her as an equal."
"If Jesus could walk on water and cucumbers are 96% water and I can walk on cucumbers does that mean the other 4% accounts for Jesus's dick?"
"How many hippies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Hippies screw in tents."
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