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Joke of the Day
"Why can't ghosts have sex? Because they have Halloweenies"
Next Joke
"Girl seeing my torn jeans Where'd you get those?! *remembers trying to pee on a hill & stumbling backwards through thorn bushes* The Gap."
"""Blown out of all proportion"" ... .. is a cliche you don't see every day of the week."
"Shout-out to everyone who is struggling with establishing their identity. You know who you are."
"I loved John Hurt so much... that I'm not even going to make the joke that my heart John Hurts right now. Even though it would make me feel better."
"Have you ever flicked a cigarette out the window then five minutes later you start to smell something? So you turn around only to find your grandma fingering herself in the back seat."
"Have you ever heard of the lady who was accused of being the infamous Quilted Killer? She's innocent until proven quilty."
"Why are ducks always sad? Because of their bills"
"An Irish man walks out of a bar...."
"I think my niece has a burgeoning slip 'n slide addiction Once you go down one, it's just a slippery slope."