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Joke of the Day
"If you want an adrenaline rush, you should go camping... It's in tents."
Next Joke
"Even paranoids have enemies."
"Me: *opens door* Yes? Him: Hi. Can I have a minute of your time to talk to you about The Lord? Me: ..Of The Rings? Him: Uh No.. *door slam*"
"Bee: I got a stinger bro! Dung beetle: Nice! [enters gods office] Sorry I'm late. Whats my special power? God: [clearly annoyed] Eating shit"
"I'll miss 10:10 on 10-10-10 but I'm sure it will be amazing for people sitting by the clock watching it all happen."
"You don't have to tell me I'm negative. I no."
"QA engineer walks into a bar ...(x-post from r/programmerHumor) Orders a beer. Orders 0 beers. Orders 999999999 beers. Orders a lizard. Orders -1 beers. Orders a sfdeljknesv."
"Stealing being illegal is why I can't have nice things."
"Four gay men walk into a bar, there is only one stool left so what do they do? Flip it over"
"My snowboarding career has really gone downhill."