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Joke of the Day

"How do redditors get their water? From a well, actually"

"The last girl I dated reminded me a lot of a cat, she would annoy me for attention, but ignore me once I gave it to her... ...the difference is that I never woke up with her asshole in my face."

"Oh trust me, I am very racist I ran plenty of marathons"

"Why were Wrigley, Doublemint, and Orbit watching CNN? To find out the latest on gum control legislation."

"A girl at my work is going to be having a baby. I haven't decided which one yet though."

"Why did the Indian not show up for work? He was Sikh."

"I'm going to slide down your chimney tonight. Wink. Wink."

"What's the difference between George Washington and Nicki Minaj? [Nicki Minaj never owned slaves.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gr1p4KtgOXc)"

"What do you call it when many people drown in Berlin? A killing Spree."

"I have a bumper sticker that says ""Honk if you think I'm sexy!"" Then I just sit at green lights until I feel better about myself!"