64029
Joke of the Day
"Jared from Subway ended his career the same way he started it. Trying to get into small pants."
Next Joke
"What do Whitney Houston and Michael Jackson have in common? They both spent a fortune making their noses more white."
"Knock, Knock Smell mop."
"I'm the kind of guy who would feel morally obligated to eat what I kill... So please don't try to rob my house..."
"What do you call a criminal dwarf on an escalator? A little con-descending"
"I'm not just pms-ing. I'm ovary acting."
"Driving isn't even in the top 5 things I'm thinking about when I'm driving."
"RULE OF THUMB: If a movie trailer makes me mutter, ""No one wants to see that,"" then about 50-100 million people will want to see that."
"At the end of each day, life should ask us, Do you want to save the changes?'"
"Why doesn't Justin Bieber shop at Sports Authority? Cuz he likes Dicks."