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Joke of the Day

"Someone stole a kitchen utensil from my house He said it was a whisk worth taking"

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"Why do smart people wear glasses? Because as resolution goes down performance goes up. This is a little bad but...."
"The phrase ""don't take this the wrong way"" has a zero percent success rate."
"What do you call a sauna massage? A saussage"
"Im absolutely exhausted, would you believe I have spent all week road testing penny farthings..... My feet haven't touched the ground."
"the first rule of OCD club is that there must be a second rule so we have an even number of rules"
"What is the car company, Kia's, main competitor? Nokia"
"Behind every successful man there's a woman they say, But behind a successful woman there's a stupid man."
"What do Russians call their sexual partners? Cumrades"
"I'm beginning to think that for some of you, the wheels on your bus do not go round & round."