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Joke of the Day

"Cinderella was thrown off the basketball team because she ran away from the ball."

"Bowlegged Pirate Did you hear about the bow legged pirate? Apparently he has C legs"

"Two elderly couple who have Alzheimers just finished having sex Male : Was it good? Female : I can't remember Male : Who are you? Sorry for the formatting sent this via my phone"

"What's the worst part about locking your keys in your car, outside of a planned parenthood center? Having to go inside and ask for a coat-hanger."

"Cute things to call your girlfriend: 1. Sugar 2. Honey 3. Flour 4. Egg 5. 1/2lb butter 6. Stir 7. Pour into pan 8. Preheat to 375"

"Everyone done keeping calm yet?"

"Some Muslim extremists just rammed a boat into the Thames Barrier. Experts believe it's the start of Ramadam."

"I measured your Mother's resistance to being accelerated by a force. The answer was massive."

"If I had a crystal ball, I'd probably walk differently."

"A mother moth was telling her baby moth off saying ""If you don't eat all your cotton you won't get any satin."""